- to stay in place in expectation of: AWAIT. (transitive verb)
- to look forward expectantly. (intransitive verb)
- the capacity, habit or fact of being patient. (bearing pains or trials calmly or without complaint; manifesting forbearance under provocation or strain; steadfast despite opposition, difficulty, or adversity)
- LOOK FORWARD
Then I remember a verse that once meant so much to me years ago.
2 Corinthians 12:9~ And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
The last four years have been particularly trying for me. Developing post-partum issues, which left me with an anxiety disorder to this day, my newborn ill, my son developing a seizure disorder out of the blue, and then his brother developing high blood sugar (who was healed by the Lord and hasn't had an issue with it since!) took a serious toll to my health and my peace. This year brought a late night ER visit by ambulance with my 3 year old daughter who couldn't breathe, followed by the sudden death of a beloved grandmother. While home for her funeral, it was discovered a massive amount of water entered our home that has been on the market for almost a year and had damaged two rooms and mold was growing. The day before her funeral was spent ripping up carpet, padding, and stick on tiles. Two weeks later? A phone call that my young aunt was being placed in Hospice and may not make it through the day.
All through this Christ has remained my strength. Though I am weak, He is strong. I may not always "feel" that strength, but when I truly place my focus on Him, He is right there beside me. I may not have it all together, but I serve a God who goes before, behind and beside me. By His grace I am what I am.
So here I stand. Waiting. Waiting on a joyous homecoming with Jesus for my aunt but a heavy heart to lose her. Waiting on healing from the anxiety disorder. Waiting for something to be done about our house. Waiting for the day when my son never has another seizure again. I'm in good company though--
Hebrews 13:5 (b)~ For He Himself has said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." (NKJV)